Ethiopia Days 5 & 6

We woke up Monday morning, in anticipation excited to spend time with our sweet boy all morning. We had missed him all weekend, and were beginning to realize the predicament the next couple of months were going to be in. We really missed Stella and Max back at home, but were happy to be with the baby, and just thinking about coming back to the States made us excited to see Stella and Max, but we knew that we were going to desperately miss our baby. no matter where we were, we were going to feel that missing piece. This last leg of waiting was, without a doubt, going to be the hardest of all.

We arrived at Acacia Village that morning, and they brought the babies out again to see their parents. We had a great time playing with him, and he was still very warm and loving towards us. As we were playing, I asked one of the nannies if it would be ok to sneak a visit in before court the next day if we hired a driver to bring us back to Acacia Village. She said that it wouldn't be a problem. Score! We were going to get to see him one last time before we had to go back home. I was relieved, especially since that second day he was having some teething issues, and you could tell he wasn't feeling his best. We got to feed him, and then he fell asleep in my arms. I waited a bit to put him in his bed for some extra cuddle time! We were walking to the infant room to put him in his bed, and there in the hallway were about 6 toddlers all lined up on training potties going to the bathroom and waving and smiling at us. It was the absolute cutest thing ever! I wish my 2 year old son could have seen it, they could have shown him a thing or two. When we went into the room to lay him in his crib, it was once again so peaceful seeing all those precious babies sleeping. Before we went to Ethiopia, I had sewed the baby a quilt of all of our old t-shirts and up to that point we had been sleeping with it everyday. That afternoon, I got to snuggle my baby boy up in his crib with his blanket, and I was overwhelmed with joy seeing him all snuggled up with it. We kissed him goodbye and knew that we only had one more opportunity to see him before we left, and every time we saw him, the realization became clearer that it was going to be extremely difficult to leave him. We decided to get to bed early since the next day we had a busy day of visitations, court, and we would be departing Addis after court.

We woke up that next morning and packed up all of our stuff in anticipation for Alazar to come pick us up to see the baby. We were really sad to be leaving Ethiopia. We were also fearful of coming back to the States after being in a country like this for 6 days, just the culture shock we would have, since we had both felt an internal change over the past week. Our wonderful guest lodge had a relaxing terrace on the rooftop and every day and night Jordan and I would go up there and just reflect on everything and take everything in. It had become kind of our spot when we needed to go and make sense of things. We were up on the rooftop when we saw Alazar drive up to take us to the orphanage. When we go to the orphanage, our sweet boy was all smiles, and we knew he remembered us from the day before. It made my heart happy knowing we would be leaving him on a happy note. We had such a great visit with him on our last visitation, and I wish we could have stayed longer, but we had court that afternoon. We told him we loved him, hugged and kissed all over him, and promised that we would come back for him as soon as we can to bring him home. There was happiness when we left. A peace. I felt secure in knowing that he was being cared for at Acacia Village. That if he wasn't able to be with us, there is no other place I would want him to be than with those sweet ladies that care for those children as if they are their own.

We left just in time to get back to our lodge and then get back on another van to go to court. Court was a very different setting than in the US. It was way more laid back and there was no court room. Just an office that we were called in when it was our turn. I had this heavy feeling the whole time, and I didn't know why, and I just wanted to stay hopeful, so I just kept trying to ignore it. We walked in the room where the judge was with the 2 other families from our agency, and we all had court together. After she asked us a few questions, she told the other 2 families that their babies were officially theirs and she said that our case was still pending, because of a document. She readjourned our court date to June 1st and said she would look over our case again then. I honestly don't remember much after that. The heaviness I had been feeling just kept getting stronger and I could sense that sadness and anger in Jordan. I couldn't breathe. I was absolutely heartbroken. We finally got back to the guest lodge and I immediately ran up the 6 flights of stairs to the terrace, my safe place, to get some air. I just completely lost it. I just cried and cried and we just stood in silence.

I know these things happen in adoption. It is a very common thing for things to be delayed. Our agency did a fantastic job informing us about this happening, but at that point it didn't matter how much I knew or what I was expecting. It hurt... It hurt so bad. I believe in God' sovereignty, I trust in His perfect timing. I  was constantly repeating that to myself, trying to believe those words even though at that moment my hope was so dim. I was praying for his loving kindness to just swarm around me at that very moment, to allow me to see Him and find that hope again that only He can give me. I went inside to send an email on my laptop to our caseworker just to clarify some things, and as I opened it, a notification popped up on my screen from a fellow Ethiopian adoptive momma that read:

"You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands." Isaiah 55:12

I went back up to the terrace and just gazed at the beautiful mountains and trees that surrounded me and this city and these people. This peace and protection came over me. Looking at His beautiful creations that I had been mesmerized with the entire time we were there, realizing it didn't matter if my heart was full of joy, full of sorrow,  full of worry, or full of despair, these mountains, everyday, shouted His name. All I could think was, He is faithful all the time and every time. He never leaves. Even in our deepest despairs, he does not waiver or change. No matter what, the mountains and trees are singing His praise. Charles Spurgeon once said, "Think not believer, that your sorrows are out of God's plan; they are necessary parts of it. We must, through much tribulations, enter the kingdom. Learn, then, even to count it all joy." I think he was onto something when he said this. The people of Ethiopia were also a true testament to this. No matter what, we can always be joyful. He once again carried me out of that place and set my feet on solid ground, and we left that rooftop in peace.

We arrived back safely in Houston on Wednesday, and drove back to Austin on Thursday. Here is the update since we have been back in the States....

One of our documents is unclear at the moment that is interfering with our court approval to make our baby boy officially ours. Our court date is readjourned for June 1st and, if God's will, hopefully we will get court approval. Our agency will be standing in for us at this date, and we pray he brings good news. The transition back has been overwhelming both physically and emotionally. I didn't think we it would have been this hard getting back into our normal lives. We need our prayer warriors to cover us in prayer...

-Pray for our June 1st court date. They are a half day ahead of us in Ethiopia, so we will hopefully hear something the morning of June 1st (our time.)

-Pray for our transition. We are feeling a lot of heaviness on our heart about Ethiopia and REALLY missing our little boy.

-Pray for our wait time. Pray that God brings us patience and peace throughout the last leg of our journey, as it's only been a week, and it feels like an eternity.

-Pray for us as we start preparing for our second trip both emotionally and financially. Pray for our health and for God to protect and provide.

Everyone's kind words, prayers, and encouragement, have been amazing the past week. It really is helping us get through these hard times of transitions, and we honestly could not get through it without all of the love and support. We thank you from the bottoms of our hearts!

Ethiopia Day 3 & 4

We couldn't go and visit our boy over the weekend, so it allowed us some time to go and see the sights and dive into the culture of Ethiopia. We hired our driver, Alazar, for Saturday and Sunday and he was fantastic! We couldn't have asked for a better driver. He is the owner of Addis Flower Guest House in Ethiopia (which we got to tour, and I would definitely recommend.) We first, went up Mount Entoto where we were able to catch a glimpse of the rural area of Ethiopia. It was absolutely beautiful everywhere you turned. Looking from on top of the mountain you could look out and see the entire city of Addis. There was something so peaceful and safe about the lay of the land. That there was this city down below full of poverty and needy people completely surrounded by this beautiful landscape of trees and mountains. It was as if the mountains and trees were protecting the city and its people. Here are some pictures of the beautiful view!

Mt. Entoto overlooking the town of Addis Ababa.

Overlooking Addis Ababa.

With our new friends, Darik and Tracy. Love them!

One of my favorite parts was watching these women carrying down from the mountain massive tree branches bundled up on their backs. Alazar told us that the women get up early in the morning to go up the mountain. They gather as many branches they can and walk them back down the mountain to make a living. It takes them half the day to get down the mountain. Just watching the way of the people and realizing how different our lives were, I was taken aback. Seeing how hard they worked, and how much they did in one day with a smile and pride on their face, was such an humbling experience. The people were so peaceful and whether they were bringing their herd of donkeys down the mountain or playing soccer in a random field with their friends, you saw this inner joy radiating out of them, and it completely rocked my world!

THE PEOPLE OF MT. ENTOTO

These women are amazing! Every morning they walk
up the mountain and collect tree branches.
 It takes them half a day to walk back down the mountain
with the branches. All to earn a living.

More resilient Ethiopian women.

donkeys, donkeys everywhere!

The kids of Mt. Entoto playing soccer.

Fields on Mt. Entoto ready for the rainy season.

While on the mountain we were able to visit some Ethiopian churches and museums. Ethiopia is a part Christian part Muslim nation. All is at peace, and they are very religious. We enjoyed learning about their customs and seeing some of the oldest churches in the history of the world. It was beautiful seeing and learning how other people halfway across the world worshipped the same God as me. They weren't afraid to lift their hands and dance and sing really loud!

The monastery of the priests and deacons from the
octagonal church on Mt. Entoto

Limestone communion cave carved out by hand during the
days of King David.

100 year old paintings depicting Jesus' miracles
inside the octagonal church.

More paintings within the church of Jesus serving His people.

The first Christian church in Addis

Another church in Addis. They believe that the Arch of the
Covenant is inside.

St. George Cathedral

Beautiful stain glass window in the bell tower
outside the St. George Cathedral

We also got to do some shopping at the market places. This is where we got the most interaction with the people. Seeing all the street children running up to us and wanting us to buy what they had offer was the most humbling of all. You see images and even some documentaries about life in a third world country from afar and I think one, you don't believe it is as bad as they are depicting it, or two, maybe you see how bad it is, but it is easier to turn the channel or turn your head, than deal with the reality of how these kids live. Seeing it with my own two eyes, was absolutely sobering. These kids are real. Their situations are real. They work day to day to provide for themselves and/or their siblings and all of them exuded so much joy and happiness, as if they had everything they needed in the world. We have so much stuff, and yet, I find myself every day complaining about something. We get upset because we want better paychecks, a better government, better healthcare, or drama-free relationships, and these people don't have any of that. Most don't have parents to fight with, healthcare when they are sick, or a government system that cannot possibly help all of the 8 million orphaned children in need of food and shelter. Their needs are OVERWHELMING but they are completely satisfied with what they are given. They praise their God everyday no matter what, and they are completely satisfied with Him and what He has given them. I had such humbling interactions that I cannot get out of my head, and don't think I ever will.

More sweet children of Ethiopia getting ready to tour a museum.

Making scarves.

The food and the coffee was absolutely fabulous. I think my husband ate more in Ethiopia than he does in the States! There was coffee everywhere you turned and all of the food was delicious.

Delicious Caramel Macchiato at Kaldi's Coffee
(equivalent to Starbucks). YUM!

Jordan's favorite Ethiopian meal which he ate almost everyday.
Tibbs and injera bread all eaten with just your hands.

Tamaco Coffee Shop with Tracy and Darik.
Met some extremely nice Ethiopian men there who were great
company. The people are so warm.

While we were out one day we were invited inside of an Ethiopian traditional wedding. They only happen 3 or 4 times a year, so it was an honor to be a part of it. We walked up and the people inside said, "please come in," and escorted us in and sat us down in the middle of the ceremony. The people around us literally were hand feeding us and shoving meat filled injera into our mouths. They got us all up and the little kids around us were showing Jordan and I the dance and rhythm of the clapping. It was unbelievable watching these people celebrate. They were even friendly towards wedding crashers!

We were invited into a traditional Ethiopian wedding.
They only have 3 or 4 a year, so it was a special and
unforgettable experience.

Beautiful little girl at the wedding.

This little boy was a doll!
He was teaching Jordan and I the song and dance
that the people were doing.

We had an unbelievable weekend, but we were so ready to go see our boy again at the orphanage, and ready to go to court so we could hear the words HE IS OURS!

Ethiopia Day 1 & 2

We had such an unbelievable experience in Ethiopia! We had an amazing 6 days that will forever change our hearts and we long for the day when we will soon return...


We arrived in Ethiopia on Wednesday night at 10pm. After a 19 hour flight with an 8 hour time change, we had just enough energy to check-in to our guest lodge and walk down the street  to grab a pizza at Bruno's, which ended up being one of our favorite places to eat. When we got back to the guest lodge, we were welcomed with a power outage (in true Ethiopian style). Thank goodness we listened and brought a flashlight. I looked at Jordan and said, "This is Africa." We went to sleep with such anticipation, knowing the next day we would be meeting our precious boy for the very first time.

Here are some pictures from our guest lodge and the streets of Bole in Addis Ababa. We loved this friendly neighborhood and all the local eateries and shops around it.

The view from our room at Afro Land Lodge. To the left are families' homes,
and along the streets are shops and local businesses. And, of course, everywhere
 you look is the beautiful Ethiopian background of mountains and
clouds that go for days.

Jordan on the lodge rooftop. I am in love with this man!

"You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains will burst
 into song before you, and all the trees in the fields will clap their hands."
Isaiah 55:12

THE PEOPLE OF BOLE, ADDIS ABABA

The produce stand on the corner.

The local hangout.
Love how affectionate everyone is towards one another!
Everywhere you turned there were people embracing each other.

Ethiopian woman preparing a meal for her family at her home.
We enjoyed getting a bird's eye view into people's day to day lives.

Enjoyed watching the neighborhood children play at their homes.
They were so incredibly cute! 

Ethiopian woman washing dishes.
These women work so hard from sun up to sun down whether it be washing
and hanging out laundry, preparing and cleaning up meals, or taking care of
their children. 

Friday morning came around quickly. We woke up to a wonderful breakfast  prepared by the guest lodge with some amazing coffee! (puts my morning coffee at home to shame) Before we knew it, we were told by the front desk that our CWA driver had arrived to take us to the orphanage to meet our son. We were the first of 3 families picked up that were also in Ethiopia meeting their children for the first time. It was such a relief meeting other families that were in the exact same position as we were, and it was great to be able to share our feelings about everything going on! We couldn't have asked for better families to travel with and walk along beside us through this part of our journey. I will never forget traveling the streets of Ethiopia. The traffic is absolutely crazy, and the streets are filled with people.

THE STREETS OF ADDIS ABABA

Imagine NYC traffic without traffic lights, stop signs, unmarked roads,
and people and donkeys everywhere you look!
The driver kept telling me to close my eyes!



Typical Ethiopian building. Everything was so colorful!

The streets of Ethiopia.

Almost to Acacia Village, the orphanage of our sweet boy.
Everywhere you looked the scenery was breathtaking.

We arrived at Acacia Village and were greeted by a few of the nannies that took care of our boy. We were escorted into a play area, and the reality hit me all at once that after 2 years of praying and waiting and longing and holding on to God's promise, we were FINALLY going to hold and love on our sweet boy in just a few moments. A little boy that had no idea how much he had been prayed for and how much he was already loved. A little boy that God set apart before he was even formed in his mother's womb. As we stood there in anticipation the nanny walked in with our sweet boy in her arms. He had just woken up from his morning nap and just looked at us intently with those big brown eyes, and I immediately stretched out my arms and embraced my precious baby boy for the very first time. I had waited for so long for this one moment, and it was so worth it, I would have waited a million more. He was very warm towards us and kept laying his head on my shoulder. I love that he loves to cuddle! We walked into the playroom and played on the floor with him. All I could do was just watch him with amazement that I was here in this moment. We made the most precious memories that morning of introducing him to his momma and his daddy! I absolutely adored watching Jordan become a father once again and falling in love with his son.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart;
I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." Jeremiah 1:5

"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come for you." John 14:18

After awhile of playing and getting acquainted with our son we were taken on a tour of the beautiful Acacia Village. We were able to meet all of the nannies that were caring for our sons, and I felt so relieved seeing them interact with him with such love and kindness. And as if my heart wasn't full enough, we were introduced to all of the other children waiting for families that lived at the village. We got to interact and play with all of the children there, love on them, and get a glimpse of their daily routine. I was so overwhelmed with emotion, but was also trying to take in every little thing about our boy...his smile, his giggles, what he liked to eat, how he liked to sleep, how he liked to be held, what toys he liked to play with, and so forth and so forth.

Beautiful acacia tree outside the orphanage.

Beautiful Ethiopian scenery from Acacia Village.

Next, it was lunchtime, so we were invited into the dining area to feed our baby and a coffee ceremony. We noticed a lot of Ethiopians serve popcorn with their coffee. I loved that! Jordan was holding our boy as we were feeding him, and he looked up at Jordan's eyes and just close his eyes and fell right to sleep. It was the most precious thing. We were able to cuddle him a little while longer and then walked him to his room and lay him down into his crib. The entire room was full of little infants sleeping in their cribs. It was so quiet and peaceful! I didn't want to leave, but I leaned over and gave our sweet sleeping boy a goodbye kiss knowing that I would see him again in a couple of days. Our hearts were completely overflowing! We had fallen in love with precious little thing, and we were just in such amazement that God chose and entrusted us to be this sweet boy's parents. There was nothing better than seeing my husband overflowing with love for this sweet child. It made me fall in love with him all over again.

That night, we had quite the adventure in a taxi cab trying to find the Island Breeze restaurant that we were meeting up at with the other families. Luckily, when we were about to tell the cab driver to take us back to the guest lodge, Jordan looked up and saw the restaurant. That night we also discovered that Ethiopia is a place where the streets have no names, so google map really doesn't help when it comes to directions. It was so great to be able to talk with the other families about meeting our children for the first time and experiencing something that not too many people get to experience.

We went to bed that night, so in awe of God and His plan and His journey that He laid out for us, and in awe of the joy and love that came flowing into our lives by walking His path. Our hearts were full and it was just two days in. We had no idea what was ahead of us and how this place and these people would take a piece of our hearts and always be a part of us.

Court Update

We are leaving today at 4:20 and will arrive in Ethiopia tomorrow at 9:10pm. We heard from the agency this morning that our court date that was supposed to happen on May 14 was adjourned to May 22nd. This is the same date as when we will appear in court for the second court hearing. This commonly happens if they are missing documents that they need. We are waiting on a very important letter from the MoWCY that we have yet to get. Please pray that the letter comes in time before court, so our court date can actually happen!! It is very important that we get this letter. We hope to have some Internet in Ethiopia, but it is uncertain. I will try to post as much as I can if we do have Internet. Thanks so much for all of your prayers. Please keep them coming!!

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FIRST COURT DATE WAS TODAY!

Today was our first court date in Ethiopia. We didn't have to be at this hearing, but it was basically the MoWCY(the people in Ethiopia regulating the orphans being matched with families) confirming whether or not, that there is enough information to determine that baby Michael is indeed orphaned and he can legally be adopted into another family. 

Unfortunately, there are power outages going on in Ethiopia right now, so our agency has still not heard about what happened during court. Our status is still pending until we hear back from them.

Hopefully we will hear good news tomorrow morning that we passed court, and yes, we can adopt baby Michael, and our second court date (the one we are traveling to go to) will remain the same and on schedule!

PLEASE PRAY that all of this happens. Pray that our court date is not moved and pray that we receive word before we get on the plane on Wednesday. We still trust in God's sovereignty and timing through all of this, no matter what that may be, and we know He is working for our good.

We still have hope, so, in the meantime I will get back to ALL of my packing!

Mother's Day

2 years ago, Jordan and my kids gave me the best Mother's Day present I could have asked for. 2 years ago, we were taking the first step of our adoption journey by filling out our application to work with CWA, our wonderful agency that has led us through our entire process. Now, we are leaving in just 3 days! In 3 days Jordan and I will be stepping onto a plane that will be heading to Frankfurt, Germany, and then to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia to go and meet our son. My head is still spinning and everything still feels so surreal!

We have greatly appreciated everyone's prayers, support, encouraging messages and words. It's as if every single word that has come our way, came at just the perfect moment when we needed to hear it! Jordan and I were discussing the other day comments that have been made about us "doing a good job" or "us deserving this." Here is the thing, we didn't do any of this and we definitely don't deserve any of it. There is nothing that we have "done" to qualify us to embark on this journey. We are completely unworthy of being able to live this story out that God has written for our lives and the only way that we got through this entire process  and the only way we are living out God's plan for us is with Him leading us every single solitary step of the way. Apart from Him, we have nothing. We bring nothing to the table. But with Him, we have everything that we need. Hallelujah, that we don't have to be qualified to live out His plan. Praise God, that He uses ordinary people to live out his extraordinary ways. Thank you, God, that I am made whole and made righteous through YOU and what you sent your son to do for me. And, that is the only qualification that is needed. This whole thing has truly been as simple as, we felt the call from God to embark on this journey and we said YES. We have clung to His promise of Him being with us always, giving us what we need, and never leaving us, and that is why we are where we are today. It hasn't been an easy road. It has probably been the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. But, He has kept His promise through it all. And, by saying yes and walking with Him daily, He is getting all the glory and we are getting this amazing blessing in the form of a little one-year-old boy that has the biggest brown eyes I have ever seen.

To all my prayer warriors that want specific things to pray about, we need you to rise up and intervene for us! 

-Pray that God protects us and provides for us the rest of the way. 

-Pray for our health. Satan has been at work in that department the last 2 weeks!

-Pray for our safe travel and that we have a smooth trip with no hold ups.

-Pray for Stella and Max and my in-laws, since they will be staying with them while we are gone!

-Pray for our court dates, May 14 and May 22. 

-Pray for the judge and all the other people involved with our case.

-Pray for our sweet baby boy. Pray for his health and his heart as he is about to meet his momma and daddy and has no clue who we are! (Scary for a little one)

We truly appreciate and feel all of your prayers.

We made our boy a little book of pictures of our home and family so that he will be able to look at them and get familiar with us. Here a couple of pictures from the book. :)

Happy 1st Birthday, Precious Boy!

Today has been 4 weeks since we got our referral for our sweet baby boy. The time has flown by it feels like as we are busy preparing for our first trip. It is extremely overwhelming trying to plan for an international trip that is coming very soon and we don't even have specific dates yet. All we know is that it is soon. We should be hearing of our court date any day now (I am hoping for tomorrow)!

When most people plan a trip, the first things would be to book a hotel, plane tickets, and then start packing and writing an agenda. Well, we are doing it all backwards. Like I have said before, the adoption road is a curvy, crazy road! Booking our flights and guest home will be the last thing that we do. We do have our itinerary for our court trip which will consist of 4 days.  The first 3 days we will be able to go and visit our son for 2 hours a day and get to take in everything and anything we can. (i.e. what he eats, how he sleeps, his daily routine, what he likes, what he doesn't like, etc.) All of the things that you figure out as a parent in your child's first year of life. The rest of our time will be filled with immersing ourselves in our new adopted culture and exploring the beautiful country of Ethiopia. The fourth day we will go to Ethiopian court and there, the judge will hopefully consent to our adoption of our baby boy. We will leave to come home from there and then after that, MORE WAITING! It never ends in the adoption world. We will be waiting to hear from the courts to tell us that baby boy is a Michael and that we can come and pick him up to COME HOME. 

If meeting your son face to face for the very first time isn't overwhelming enough, we also are preparing our bodies, minds, and hearts for visiting a third-world country. A country that has become a part of me. A country that I cannot wait to go and see and take in. So what have we done so far? Jordan and I have been vaccinated (6 shots each, ouch!) and educated about all the potential health risk of traveling to Ethiopia. We have been re-fingerprinted through the FBI to update our boy's visa approval. We have been busy gathering donations that we will take to our son's orphanage and also putting together a couple of gifts for baby boy to leave with him while he is waiting to come home. We have been researching Ethiopia and all of the things we want to see and guest homes that we are looking into staying at. We have started making a packing list that consists of bug spray, flashlights, and yes, toilet paper! And, we have also decided to throw in another garage sale before we go to offset some of the embassy and visa fees. Like we didn't have enough on our plates already. Anything to make the time go by faster.

In between all of that, I can't help but think of my boy every waking minute of the day. The other day I read this verse and it spoke so much truth and validation into my life right now. This is what God has in store for me and my life, right now, at this very moment.

"May the God of hope fill you with all the joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

 

Now that I have all the things done that I can possibly do for now, I find myself having idle time, so I made a list of things that I CAN do in the meantime, as we wait and wait some more.....

I can pray for my son.

I can pray for his birth family and their situation.

I can pray for the nannies at the orphanage that are caring for our boy while we can't.

I can pray for the courts and everyone involved with our case.

I can pray for our transition.

I can love my little guys that I have right here in front me.

I can talk with them about what it is going to be like when baby brother arrives.

I can prepare our home.

I can advocate for other orphans to find a forever family.

I can use our story to encourage others to walk in faith.

I can show more grace and mercy to the people God has put in my life at this moment.

I can fundraise.

I can enjoy the last months of being a family of 4.

I can lean on my husband and friends and family for support when the waiting gets too hard.

I can grow more in Christ.

I can let the hope of God overflow out of me and onto others.

I can....

Today is our sweet boy's first birthday. Even though he wasn't with us, we decided to celebrate from afar and make some memories for him.

Happy Birthday, sweet baby boy! How we wish you could be here blowing out your own candle today, but we will settle for, at least, being under the same sky. We long to embrace you and kiss your sweet face and will be coming to you soon. We pray that God pours out his love on you, and he gives you hope that your family is coming for you.

 Love, your momma.

"A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families." Psalm 68:5-6